my mother's day post...several days late...because I am a mother

Two years ago I wrote this post for Mother's Day. It was no doubt my truth. I openly shared that motherhood was hard for me at first. I still struggle with envious thoughts when I see first time moms who transition flawlessly and are at the park with their kids on day 5 of life. I still barely got out of my pajamas at month three. But, that is their story and their truth, and they have other struggles as a mom that I may not ever face.

And this year on Mother's Day I had two babies to fill my arms. The richness of that statement is not lost on me.

While we were at church we sang several songs, as we always do. But this time, as I stood in the pew by myself since Brent was onstage, two lines from two different songs stood out to me:

Grace has saved us-- nothing of our own. 

Oh to Grace how great a debtor, daily I'm constrained to be. 


And as a mom in that pew on Mother's Day singing, I realized grace is my truth this Mother's Day. Grace is my story this year.

Grace in the meltdowns.
Grace in the inadequate meal prep.
Grace in the too-much-tv-time.
Grace in the "busy".
Grace in the yelling.

I have to give myself grace or I will crumble under the weight of it all. I'll crumble under the feelings of inadequacies...UNLESS... I give myself grace.

Grace. That free and unmerited favor from God.
Nothing of our own.

Two years ago I wrote motherhood is a slow process that bombards us all at once. I wrote there is something beautiful in the hardness of it all; there is something beautiful in the messy moments of becoming a mom. And I have learned since then that that beauty? It is grace.

And daily I cling to it.
have Meagan take ALL your pictures if  you're in Louisville area
So this Mother's Day I hope you accept grace for yourself.
And I hope you extend it to other mamas, and all the women I see everyday.

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1 comment:

Hannah said...

You worded this so well. Grace is a beautiful gift. Thanks for sharing your thoughts on grace, I feel like I am needing more and more grace these days [and I'm sure even more in the months ahead].

Also, can I bribe you to come take some pictures of the baby/us after the baby is born? Or your friend? Can I bribe her? Or really, the question is more, why did we leave Louisville? I feel like I need a photographer and I cannot find a good [and affordable] one in this area. Unlike at the hospital Emerson was born at there is no photographer at the hospital here to capture newborn pictures and it makes me so sad. There is something so sweet about having quality pictures of your new baby/new family - pictures that you are in! the struggle is real. Anyhow. If you decide you can be bribed with food, a free place to sleep, toys for your girls to play with, a brand new baby to cuddle.... just let me know. Okay! :)