#dirtypics

About a year ago some friends from small group were joking about how we needed to start posting "dirty pictures" on our social media. Before you all disown me, of course we only were referring to realistic pictures of our lives that are not glitzy, not Pinterest worthy, and not something an Instagram filter could clean up. Reality. The raw, the messy, the every day. The parts of us we don't post on instagram. One of the guys said we should post those pictures and hashtag dirtypics. Unfortunately our idea of #dirtypics and others' ideas of #dirtypics are different, so that idea was put to rest quickly, but not before he posted a picture of his wife cleaning out her pantry at 1 a.m. #dirtypics.

I like this idea, and it was one that I was struck by again when I was recently listening to a sermon about this very topic. Women in particular struggle with the comparison game anyway, so why do we subject ourselves to "the scroll"? You know what I mean by the scroll-- flipping through Facebook or Instagram, seeing the well-balanced meal your friend  coworker-from-8-years-ago-that-you-haven't-talked-to-since-you-moved-7-years-ago-posted and feeling bad about the frozen pizza you just stuck in the oven for your family...again.

I don't intentionally post pictures with the thought "oh, this will make me look really good and make it look like I have it all together." BUT, I also rarely post pictures of meltdowns and dirty diapers and piles of laundry, so by the lack of their appearance I am often just painting one portion of the picture. Which presents a falsity. Which is where the struggle begins because we all do that. And when you take that times the 500 people we are scrolling through, well, our dirty dishes and tantrum-ing toddler can seem not good enough. And where did I go wrong? 

You didn't go wrong. You're doing awesome. We're just not posting our own dirty pictures.

So, lest I ever leave you with some false ideas of my reality, here are some of my truths:

/ the girls woke up early today. Early to them is not early early, but still I stay up too late reading and so any amount of early makes me grumpy and can't-get-out-of-bed-y. So I let Becks cry for about 15 minutes, and I went in Blythe's room and told her she could get out of bed but had to stay in her room and promptly shut the door. I texted Brent, who was finishing his workout in the mudroom, to come get Becks and I crawled back in bed. #lazy

/I hate meal time. It's the worst. I never know what to make the girls and regardless of what I make all they want is bread and crackers anyway, so nine times out of ten they get peanut butter sandwiches. They don't eat enough fruit. They don't like enough vegetables. #healthy

/ Becks is in a screaming stage. I think she wants to talk but can't but knows what she wants but can't communicate it...thus screaming. Real pleasant. #thevolumeisinsane

/ I had a friend over for coffee this morning and no sooner had she walked in the door than Blythe threw herself on the floor in a fit because her doll wouldn't fit properly in the blanket. Legs flailing. Welcome to our home. #hospitality

/ Yesterday we rushed home from church, threw the girls in their beds for nap, and were scrounging in the fridge for lunch. Brent was getting some stuff out, so I stuck my head in the fridge and was handing him the other ingredients he needed, but he didn't take them from me immediately and I got impatient. He sensed my impatience, grabbed them from me rather not-nicely, and we ate the first 5 minutes of our lunch in silence. #tilldeath

/  I'm trying to sort through all my closets and drawers and corners and crevices and am getting ready for a big, huge garage sale [June 5 & 6 if you're in the area!], and so there are literally piles everywhere. Today, as I write this post, this is my bathroom:

/ Also, I snapped a picture of my kitchen floor for you:

/ Also, this random assortment of bills and coupons and hair clips and other paraphernalia is happening:

/ When I say I "planted a garden" don't be fooled: I stuck three pepper plants in the corner of my backyard. And when I say "I stuck three pepper plants" don't be fooled: my dad came over and stuck three pepper plants in the corner of my backyard. #greenthumb

/ Sometimes I put the girls in the crib together so I can go to the bathroom by myself. #containthem

/ If we have clothes on before 8:30, Blythe immediately asks where we are going. #wedontgetoutmuch

/ I do laundry on Tuesdays. It usually takes me a solid two weeks before I fold and put away. However, there is still a laundry basket in Becks' room that has [folded!] clothes from approximately 3 weeks ago. #procrastination

/ This weekend I finally sorted through the girls' clothes in their closets and drawers and pulled out the next size and season. I kind of skipped this last year with Blythe's stuff because I had a baby and because Kali was bringing me hand me downs in small doses and it just was a mess. Blythe still had some 18-24 MONTH stuff in her drawers. #organizationskillz

So there you have it. I could go on, and on, but just wanted to make sure to keep it real for ya. I've always felt like I can be vulnerable with others and I tend to trust easily, but social media is its own beast in so many ways and I apologize if I've ever come across as anything other than someone taking a day at a time, sifting through the mess, and enjoying whatever most of what happens.

What would your #dirtypics be?