An open letter to my student loans

Dear Student Loans,

Yeah, you. You know who you are. But my real question is, do you know what you are doing? Do you know the life-blood you are sucking?

Let me tell you something, Student Loans, a few years ago I probably led you on. Sure, we had a good relationship at the start. You kept me from breaking into tears when I had to go see Deb at the little pay window in Zw. Hall to pay my monthly tuition. I was able to write the check because of you, and for that I am grateful. I'm sorry if this led you to believed there was something special between us. I'm sorry if I wasn't quite honest at the time.

You see, Student Loans, I saw this coming a long time ago. I should have said something, but I needed you then. Not all of us were fortunate enough to get the Peale. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have mentioned his name in your presence, but it's true. The Peale is much more generous and GIVES the money instead of expecting payback. I guess I'm just saying that I feel you're a bit selfish.

It's been 2 years since I started trying to pay you off, and I just don't think this relationship is working for me anymore. You're nice enough, but lately, I just think you're a little too unapproachable. I would use the 'it's not you, it's me' excuse... but instead I have to break your heart and let you know that I'm seeing other Student Loans. And it's too much pressure trying to make you all feel taken care of at once.

And there is something else: My husband and I really want a new computer. But you are standing in the way. Is this bitterness towards you unfair? Unreasonable? I don't think so.

I know you still have great interest in me...actually I feel that I'm only paying your interest. I just need you to know that there is fresh blood out there. There are new college freshman almost daily, I'm sure. Their bank accounts are just waiting to be owned by you. So please, let me be. Get off my back.

Before I go, I want to tell you a brief story. There once was a Student Loan that was very helpful. He helped me pay for some tuition in college, but he knew when it was time to let go. He said he forgave me, or that he was forgivable, I don't remember which. And forgiveness is biblical. So maybe we could work something out?

Student Loans, we've been doing this dance long enough. Will you throw up the white flag please? I didn't want it to come to this but... I hate you.

Unfortunately in your debt,



Ana-Lou said...

Nicely written! Many understand your frustration whether past, present or could be future.

Mose said...

I was having this discussion last night: if you die, are your student loans forgiven? I said yes; my roommate said no.

*carrie* said...


Have been thinking more about your thrifty/BN ways. It occurred to me that you need to move close to family when you have kids, because it's going to be hard for you to pay a babysitter--even a super duper one. Believe me, I know. =)

Anonymous said...

How I remember your torture on some of those "payment due days." Don't have to go to the little window anymore but still....

Great post, Kelsey.
Love you lots, Aunt Linda

Kali said...

And that, dear sister, is why we are starting early on Caroline's Peale.

But I agree. Oh how much I agree.

Anonymous said...

Doesn’t it seem strange that a college or university would encourage its students to mortgage their future? Many academics have this misguided notion that others should sacrifice to support their MWF 3 hour daily class schedule so they may devote the rest of the week to exercise their intellectual freedom. The poor old student loan just did what he was ask to do and he’s not asking us to do anything he didn’t tell us about up front. Next time someone tells you its okay to mortgagee your future to finance their lifestyle—RUN!

Lyricality said...

I concur. Sucktown. Miss Sallie is mean. Nicely worded! Interest is a bad word.