as I get older..

I realize that I graduated from high school only eight years ago, but that seems like a fairly significant amount of time. In that time I thought I would have figured out some basic life things.

For example: Makeup. Is it just me or do you also feel like every other adult woman actually understands makeup. They know what colors, brands, brushes, etc. to use. And here I am, still dabbing and smearing on essentially the same stuff I wore 8 years ago. Do I just not care? Or do I really NOT GET IT? I mean, I can put on eyeliner and mascara and make it look okay, but haven't figured out how to do anything spectacular with my makeup. Particularly my eye makeup. Every day I put a little Mary Kay shadow on, possibly some eyeliner, a little mascara, and I'm done. For every day, that is good enough for me. But then when a special occasion rolls around, or I just want to look a little FANCY, do you know what I do? I put a little Mary Kay shadow on, possibly some eyeliner, a little mascara, and I'm done. I've got no game when it comes to makeup- no tricks up my sleeve. I really thought this would be something that I would figure out more as I got older, but I just keep going back to the same makeup aisle.

Another example: Shaving. I thought that as I aged, my time shaving would decrease. I figured, "Hey, the more you do something, the quicker you become." FALSE. Shaving takes the same amount of time as it did in high school….actually, that's a lie too because it probably takes a little longer as my thighs' girth increases a bit. It is true that I don't care as much, so I may not be as meticulous [read: I rarely take the time to REALLY shave my knees or ankles. What's the point. That's just asking for blood]. But it takes the same gosh dern amount of time. That's okay though…I make up for it in my makeup routine.

And finally: driving a stick. I attempted to learn how to drive a stick when I was 16. I could putz around town okay…if I didn't have to stop. But once I figured out it didn't really offer me any benefits in life, I decided I could put off learning until I was an adult. After all, I thought, things like this are probably much easier to learn as an adult, especially since I'll have been driving for much longer then. FALSE. Not only do I still not know how to drive a stick [small town kids everywhere shudder], but I have FORGOTTEN the little that I did know way back when. Putzing around town would not even be an option anymore. Some things do not come more easily with age.

Maybe I just have to wait a few more years before I can figure out how to apply blush properly, or how to navigate ankles with a razor just a bit faster, or shift gears manually. I doubt it…but here is to hoping.

*an additional note: I'm not even going to get started on hair. Kali JUST TAUGHT ME [last week], how to use a blow dryer to help "style." WHO KNEW?! Did I just miss classes on these things or did I just not care enough when I was a teenager? Did I work too much on perfected my free throw shooting when I should have been manipulating makeup brushes and blowdryers? Lucky for me, Blythe doesn't have any hair so at least I can't mess hers up!


momiss said...

I fail to find any fault with your makeup routine. Perhaps because it is exactly the same as mine. ;)
I would tell you the same thing I tell girls who dream of boob jobs. "Honey, it's not about your boobs. Or your makeup."
It's really not. The cosmetic companies will never tell you this, for obvious reasons.
The good news is my older friends tell me eventually the hair stops growing (can't wait for that) and there is a product to make your eyelashes fuller and longer that I am going to try. Which means I will hopefully be able to stop the mascara step, because I have spent approx. 30 years wiping it from under my eyes. It gets old.

Brent said...

When we got married, we even owned a manual car...and still Kelsey didn't learn. For all you thinking...well if she had to drive one then she'd learn...Nope :)

Kali said...

I feel like I have failed you as a sister. BUT, in my defense...I'm pretty sure you would not have appreciated any of my advice back in the days when you were trying to see how long you could go between shaving your legs. Also, if your car had broken down half as many times as mine did -- and you had been forced to drive dad's truck -- you might have learned. But after reading Brent's comment, I'm gonna go with not ;-)

Also, I suck at make-up too. That is all.