Time, Today, Television

Time:

I only have 15 days of school left. (If you do the math, you'll realize this means I will be in school in June, which should be illegal). Regardless of the fact that I wish I were done now (and wondering how all you other 12 month people do it?!), I can't believe how quickly this past year has gone. This time last year I was up in Wisconsin marrying off my friend Renae, and getting together last minute things for my wedding. Brent was graduating this day a year ago, and then preparing for his start at Southeast here in Louisville. It was a scary and exciting time of year for both of us.

I remember last summer; the anticipation of being married, and dreading the move far away from familiar. I remember unpacking and then laying out at the pool everyday because I knew no one and knew where nothing was. I was preparing for my upcoming school year; wondering what my students would be like-- wondering if I really had what it took to be a teacher. I was questioning whether I had the strength to stay here a year.

This morning in church we sang a song and it took me back to that time in a flash. I remember several occasions having the radio on and hearing this song and dissolving into tears. The words? Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, Your perfect love is casting out fear. And even when I'm caught in the middle of the storms of this life, I won't turn back,I know you are near.

And I will fear no evil, For my God is with me. And if my God is with me, Whom then shall I fear? (Chorus:) Oh no, You never let go. Through the calm and through the storm. Oh no, You never let go In every high and every low, Oh no, You never let go, Lord, You never let go of me And I can see a light that is coming for the heart that holds on. A glorious light beyond all compare. And there will be an end to these troubles, But until that day comes, We'll live to know You here on the earth

Yes, I can see a light that is coming for the heart that holds on, And there will be an end to these troubles, But until that day comes, Still I will praise You, still I will praise You

Thanks for that song, Matt Redman. I don't feel right describing last summer as a dark time for me, but it was definitely a difficult time of transition. Singing that song this morning in church, I realized that the Lord truly never lets go of us in those moments we can only see as darkness. He is holding tighter to us, even if we are hanging on for our life to Him.

Now that Brent and I have decided to stay for another year, I look back on this time and just have to shake my head at how silly it was for me to think I couldn't do it. I hope in the future I will realize again in these moments that there is a light coming for the heart that holds on. I don't know where you're at right now, but I hope you hold on and praise Him through it!

Today:

Interesting enough, I watched a Nooma video yesterday entitled "Today." This really hit home with me, as I feel that once I "got" this message, I was able to move past the "dark" time I was describing above. In the video, pastor Rob Bell is trying to get across the fact that life is not static. It moves. There is ebb and flow and we have to ebb and flow with it.

Do we believe the best days are behind us? How much energy do we spend wishing things were the way they were?

I know I have a tendency to do this. I have loved my life. I have had a good life. Great parents, a happy home to live in, a sister who didn't fight with me (much), intelligence to enjoy school, friends to survive jr. high and high school, athletic ability to create memories in sports, a wonderful college community, amazing friends...you get the picture. I have been so blessed and it is easy for me to, instead of just appreciating the fact that this is my legacy, trying to recreate it and trying to get back there.

Bell says in the video, "Despair sets in when we believe life was better back then. When we hold onto the past, our arms aren't' free to embrace today."

My prayer now is not that I can forget my past, but that I can realize that I have a rich past that I can remember and celebrate. I have a past that I was wise enough to fully live in the present in...I didn't miss anything, and I don't want to do that with what God is trying to give me today.

"May you accept the past for what it is. May you celebrate what needs to be celebrated. Grieve what needs to be grieved. And may you receive from God a new spirit-- one for here--now--today."

Television:

Wow...I have been reflective, haven't I? I'll try to balance that out and move into something a little more superficial.

Yesterday we bought our "something." I really thought about your comments and Brent and I talked a lot, as this was a "big deal" for us. I heard a minister say the other day that the times in your life when it's hardest to figure out what to do with your money is in your 20s and 60s because that is when your income changes drastically. (Tangent. Sorry.)

As you can probably tell by the subheading, we decided on a TV (and decided the computer will come next). We ended up getting one at HHGregg, and stumbled upon a 3 day sale we didn't even know what happening! Awesome. We are truly enjoying our new LG flat screen!? (Who are we?)

Before:After:
Before:After:
We also decided it was finally time I get the "laundry cart" I had had my eye on since last summer. Nothing special, just a storage unit that sits between the washer and dryer, but we were excited (and it was on CLEARANCE!):
There were two other purchases that are worth mentioning. The first was a flat clasp wallet (I don't know what they are really called). I don't know if you have seen these, but they are awesome and I have been wanting one for a very long time. I am not really a purse person, and hate carrying purses into stores, and usually just end up carrying my wallet. Well, Brent decided it was time and he helped me pick out this one. Please notice how much smaller it is than the other wallet (and how much cuter!):

And one more item I have been wanting since I was a curly haired child: John Freida's Frizz-Ease hair products. These were also on special, and I really like them. Especially the "dream curls" spray that helps "revitalize" curls when they are dry. I have also found that I have to use less of these products then the cheaper ones I usually buy. I don't know if I can work them into our budget all the time, but it is a nice treat.

Alright, it is time to take the pot roast out of the crock pot! I also need to give Brent's hair a trim. Tonight we are going to the church for a final get together with other interns on the fifth floor since this is the last weekend they will all have keys and access (internships are officially over this week...I'll keep you updated).

Also: I am enjoying a cup of freshly brewed Starbucks coffee. A student of mine brought me a pound of beans this week. Thoughtful. And delicious.

Hope you are enjoying your Sunday. And this incredibly long post is over.